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Letting Go

October 5, 2010

Tricia's snow shot.

This will be a posting of a different sort one more personal, dealing with parents and children and our interaction with them. Today I will write a bit about my daughter Tricia Lynn and in a future posting about my son Anthony. I hope you do not mind this different direction.

Sorry I have been absent from posting for a while. We have had our first ground covering snow fall and the temperature out here has been in the teen’s. Up here we are entering, what I consider, one of the two worst times of the year, and I have fallen behind in preparing for winter. It’s that time when the temperature is between 32 and 20. When we have these temperatures it still in fact does rain or at best sleet and when this lands on the roadway if it has been cold enough long enough you get black ice. Now all the roads are different and you may be driving along and hit a section of ice and never know of it till you try to stop or turn. Trust me I learned the hard way, and it seems that every year all of us here have to re-learn to be more cautious.

Now in Fairbanks they seem to have not entered this phase of winter yet, as evidenced on the Newsminer Arctic cam, but out here sitting on a 1,300 foot hill the snow has stayed and the road is icy. We do have some of the best crews in the US working in the Alaskan DOT and they were on it right away but they can only do so much for ice. In Alaska we do not use salt to melt the ice, the best we do is scrape the roadway and spread gravel for better traction.

Normally the icy roads do not bother me much, I just wait till the roads have been driven on for a while before I go into town. Now however I am always thinking of my daughter who moved here in 2009. Yes she did go through last winter and faired pretty good, but no matter how old our children are we are still concerned for there welfare. Considering she has go to work she is exposed to the roads every day, and can’t just wait till the road conditions improve.

We have had a few discussions where I voiced my concern and I usually get the same response. I am thirty something, and can handle this on my own. But as parents should we ever stop being concerned or stop wanting to help our children? Every child it seems as soon as they are a teenager ‘can do it themselves’, and let us know about it. In those teen years it is a bit easier to overrule them and point them in the right direction. But when they are adults it is a different story. We may have the benefit of age and experience and can see the big picture that lies before them, but how do we get this information across to them and have them accept it now that they to are adults.

I guess it is one of the many dilemmas of life that really has no answer. I think we just continue to talk with them and remind them that it is our opinion and hope they get the message. I also think advice given in the form of gently repeated conversation may over time sink in. We may still be seen as nagging them but after all we are old people and isn’t that what we do?

1st light snow viewed from my cabin window

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. AussieAlaskan permalink
    October 5, 2010 2:35 pm

    Pete, they are after all, still our children – continue doing what you do!

    Like

  2. Rosalyn permalink
    October 5, 2010 3:55 pm

    All you can do is love them and if you did a good job raising them, they eventually go in the right directions. Or not.

    Like

  3. Daddy permalink*
    October 6, 2010 10:49 pm

    And our children remain our children till the end of our time.

    Like

  4. Tricia... the daughter permalink
    October 26, 2010 1:43 pm

    ….and i do all ways listen to your advise…. and i do all ways respect what you have to tell me… but i will still make mistakes some times….

    Like

    • AussieAlaskan permalink
      October 26, 2010 7:16 pm

      Right again! It’s the way of the world.

      Like

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